ungghh

You said you missed me, you said you wanted to apologize.
I hold apologies in high regard, it would mean a lot to me.
you said lunch
because you said we should at least talk.
so where are you?

you haven't changed a bit.
so why do I miss you for this frustration you always gave me?

I hope no one ever reads my ramblings...

"I usually figure that the reason most people don't talk to me is because they could care less about me.
now someone misses me and i don't know who it is"

Sometimes I really miss you

You show up in my dreams, over and over again, and each time I wake up crying. You coming back to me is against the odds and thats what I've got to face, But even though I know this, I'm too stupid, too confused too hopeful, too something to realize that it really is the truth. I wish I could realize it, because every now and then, when I really have forgotten about you, you show up again. Not in a physical manifestation, but somewhere in my thoughts, in my dreams, It seems you never really did escape me. Or was it me trying to escape you? it's driving me insane, I can't stand it, the worst part is I can't controll it. Whenever something reminds me of you, it reminds me of you too well. And it's in those moments and those moments only that I can remember everything you said, the exact way you would look at me, kiss me, hold me, talk to me.
These moments make me cry.
Because it was all so perfect, It was all so sweet, and it makes me miss you so much that it hurts.
And when it hurts, it hurts so bad that I do irrational things.
I shouldn't have talked to you again, I shouldn't have told you I missed you, because you said you missed me too.. and now I really can't get you out of my mind.
Sometimes I wish I never met you but when I wish this I know I am lying to myself. I am glad I met you I just wish you were back here with me, muttering sweet nothings in my ear.

I lied. I wish I never met you because then I wouldn't be in this predicament. This predicament that makes me feel like a crazy over obsessive girl. I wish being a obsessive girl was at least in my power to control. It's not that I can't forget about you, It's that my subconscious won't allow me.
If I get get rid of the dreams of you, Maybe I could get rid of you.

I wish I never told you that I missed you, but most of all I wish you never told me that you missed me too
I hate it because it gives me hope.
and that is the same reason why I am secretly happy you said so.